A friend who is in arts has been sick of life in arts; she reckons it shouldn't be so hard. For some months/years, we cooked up ways for her to generate exposure and income, and in the past we had fun because many of what we discussed could apply to me. But her recent sense of entitlement is making me bored. I feel guilty I'm married to man with a day job, who is OK with me doing what I do; I feel she always leaves me with homework even though that's not her intention; I feel terrible when my ideas don't work, even though she doesn't try most of them. And it's not like she hasn't had success.
I know it's a lot to do with my perception and projection. I complain about my "career", too, but I don't really mean it because I don't try hard enough to deserve to complain. Sometimes it helps to complain to just get it out, and sometimes by exploring what I'm complaining about, I find new ways to work, or market my work.
There is one thing I learned from our discussions; we can't afford to wait to be "discovered" because nobody has as big a stake in our careers as ourselves, and when it really gets too hard, it's time to get out. I can't believe I said it out loud the last time I saw her. I'm glad I'm in it for the inherent joy of making. Even if I don't sound like it here sometimes.
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So, it is possible to weave a scarf in 15-minute increments. It took some time, but I wove the last of the two-teal Log Cabin piece this week. And considering I sometimes stay away from looms for months, it was a great lesson; I should weave every single day, even if for 15 minutes.
At the end of the teal warp I knew I had another Log Cabin warp but I couldn't remember what colors; it turns out this is a handsome two-navy warp, but it's even harder to see the color difference. I'll see if I can shoot it in daylight.
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Every so often I want to chuck in everything on the Internet and be the hermit weaver I once wanted to be. I did for quite a while. But I don't delete everything because: 1) I would miss your friendship/our camaraderie, 2) I live in a small place and I feel I might get swallowed into the ground/wave/ether if I'm not on the Internet, and 3) I don't have the guts.
On Monday I discovered Google Image Ripper; "discovered" because I probably heard of it before but in the most general way; I didn't think it would concern me specifically. But my heart skipped a beat when actually saw my pics and realized how unprotected my photos were.
Then today I came across Pracownia's closed blog, and I thought I was getting too old for this, that I don't want to spend so much time learning new Internet things, that I'd rather be weaving. It's probably the same way Mom felt 10 years ago when she decided against having a computer and Internet; she'd chose to use the time to weave one more piece. Besides, if we're talking about the bottom line, I've never generated a sale from the Internet.
I'll let you know if/when I decide to disappear, but it's not likely to happen any time soon. But you know how things happen in threes? Notice it's only Wednesday night here, so there's still time for one more Internet freak-out this week.
Yay! Not.
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Screen print of trying to access a closed blog: the email address was my usual one, but you get the picture; there's no links or clue.
7 comments:
Some people do seem to have a stronger built-in sense of entitlement than others (and I have a couple of family members who really excel in this area!). Seriously, I have been wondering whether this isn't a key driver of the art/craft debate. There are those craftspeople who feel that their work *should* be appreciated as art, for whatever reason, and get really steamed up when they feel that the rest of us are somehow sabotaging their efforts by not being conceptual enough in our making to justify their claims. This neatly passes the burden of guilt/responsibility onto those of us who just want to Make Stuff. I may be way off course with this, but whenever there is whining, there is usually a thwarted sense of entitlement behind it... well, there is when I am whining, anyway.
I've never heard of that blog, by the way; sounds weird to me.
Aha, now I've read your update on the previous post and I see that the blog thingummy is resolved. Phew.
Said friend never used to be like this, to the point I wondered if it was my bad influence, and still do sometimes. She says it's her friends who helped her a lot throughout her career.
Said blog is a legitimate weaving blog from Poland, I believe. I don't know why it's a closed one, but that's up to each blogger, I guess. I don't, though, apologize for being freaked out today.
Oh, time lag. There's something wrong with our Internet tonight. That doesn't happen with foot looms, that's for sure!
There is another similar complaint in my circle of artist friends, that the public in our realtively small city does not appreciate art or is not willing to pay for art. SO at Art festivals and group shows, I see these artist producing the most horrible work you can imagine. I mean really, it often looks like a 5th grader level of skill. And I think, well, who would WANT to buy that crap? And i do know several people who do spend sizable money on art. And they are not looking to be made a fool by parting with their hard earned money for junk. However Meg, I am not at all suggesting your work falls into this category, simply making a comparison in the attitude that these artist seem to think the world ought to scoop up their terrible art at a bargain. It is makes the local art scene a bit of a joke.
I think making for pleasure is a good idea.
Do not understand everything in this discussion, because I have problems with the translation.
Why is my blog raises such interest? That's my kind of log, for neighbors and friends from the neighborhood. I learn only and have nothing to show.
This is a private blog. It is not public.
I do not know why it bothers anyone?
I do not understand this.
Yours
Damroka
Dana, the eternal conundrum, yes? Her work isn't bad, and she's very confident about the quality. Thinking back on our discussions, I think fame (and therefore "automatic" income) might have been one of the things she always aimed for.
Pracownia/Damroka, the third and fourth part of this post might have explained to you why, and sorry for the miscommunication. I've asked someone to translate the important parts so I'll post it here later. Meanwhile, please take me off your blog's access list.
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